Friday, March 17, 2006

A Neuropathic Villanelle


We all have our crosses to bear
I clench tight my fist, knuckles in white rows—
All I can do is sit and stare.

Spitting and popping, my nerves are flayed bare,
I can’t transcend the pain, and I suppose
we all have our crosses to bear.

The smoldering silent biting Night-mare:
Its fire creeps slowly, as if it knows
All I can do is sit and stare.

Only so much and it begins to wear
me down—wordless passion and twisted pose:
We all have our crosses to bear.

When I’m stressed it comes as a white-hot flare,
and when relaxed, sparks as it comes and goes—
all I can do is sit and stare.

Sometimes, I forget I have a hand there—
It’s a little loss of self, and God knows
we all have our crosses to bear.
All I can do is sit and stare.


© 2006

1 comment:

james sherwood said...

I have neuropathic pain and numbness secondary to spinal disc damage at C4-C5. Subjectively, it is either a burning-type pain on the lateral aspect of my forearm, from my elbow down to my thumb, or little shock-y tickles.
I had an anterior cervical discectomy and fusion a few years back, but it seems that some of the damage is permanent, and I have some pain in my arm as a result. I don't know why, but it seems that when I'm feeling stressed, the pain is worse; either I can't deal with it as well, and so it only seems worse, or there's some mechanism that I am ignorant of that causes the nerves to fire off more.
Either way, it sucks enough of my waking consciousness up that I wrote a poem about it.